ఎప్పుడెలా నీ చేతుల్లో పడ్డానో, నా శరీరం నీ మాటెందుకు వింటోందో, నీ ఊపిరి తాకి నా పంచేంద్రియాలు ఒక్కసారిగా వేణువల్లే రాగాలు ఎప్పుడందుకున్నాయో .. ఓ మాయల ఫకీరూ, తెలీకుండానే నిలువెల్లా నీ వశమైపోయా!
మగాడిలా నువ్వు నాలోకి దూకి నన్నలా దున్నుతుంటే, నా ఈ మేనంతా చేనైపోయింది. తొలకరిలో తడిసిన నేల మాదిరి నా ఒళ్ళంతా పచ్చి మట్టి వాసన. కళ్ళు తెరుచున్నప్పుడు కూడా ఎప్పుడూ చూడలేదు ఇన్ని రంగులు, ఇప్పుడేమో మూసిన కనురెప్పల వెనక పేలుతున్న ఈ కొత్త రంగులేంటో నీకు చెప్పటానికి, పేర్లు కూడా తెలీవు నాకు.
భూమి మీద మాత్రం లేనని తెలుస్తోంది, లేకపోతే ఒంట్లోని ప్రతి అణువుని ఉండి ఉండి నక్షత్రాలు దాడి చేస్తున్నట్టు ఎందుకుంది?? కలో ఇలో తేలని ఆ తమకం లో ఎన్నో భయాల నడుమ నీ దరి చేరిన నన్ను రసఖండంగా మార్చి నా బెదుళ్ళని పటాపంచలు చేసిన నీకు ఏ పూలతో పూజ చేయాలో తెలీలేదు.
కొన్ని ఏళ్లుగా సంభోగం లో నిశ్శబ్దంగా, స్థబ్ధంగా పాల్గొంటున్నా, ఈ పూట నాకు మొదటి సారి నీ వల్ల అర్థమయ్యింది.. ఆ భావాన్ని భావప్రాప్తి అని ఎందుకంటారో. నా గతానికి ఏ పేరు పెట్టాలో తెలీదు కానీ, ఈ అనుభూతిని నాకు రుచి చూపించిన నీతో గడిపిన ఈ రాత్రే నాకు మొదటి రాత్రి.
When the Sun started to set, it was phenomenal. I lurked behind the walls to hide myself from the overwhelming darkness. Suddenly I realized a warm light spreading in my little world. I wondered where it came from! There.. I couldn’t miss the lovely Moon shining from above.
The Moon was simply there.. and his mere presence brought back immense strength from deep within. He helped me see clearly even through the darkness. I picked up the broken pieces of my heart in the light and gathered myself.
Almost every night we would have nice talks about everything and nothing. He would let me soar up and up above the clouds and take me to explore the infinite sky. He would help me fly and never let me fall. I would shudder when his breath grazes my skin and when his warm hand cups my face. I almost melt in his warmth when he hugs me.
But then, he always leaves before dawn. And, when its time for him to leave, I would start missing him already… like hell, like he is taking away a piece of me with him!
Did you ever meet someone who feels like your other half? Did you ever wanted to take it to next level, but was scared to do so? Are your past experiences stopping you from taking the next step? Let me tell you a small story about someone who felt just like you…
A boy and a girl knew each other for a long time. They both shared a great bond, they could understand each other without words being said. They shared almost everything and supported each other in many ways. Their relationship had no name but it was nothing less than love. One day she asked him if they can give their relationship a name. He said he is scared to name it and scared to trust anyone to that extent.
She said, “Let’s give it a try. Let’s not commit to anything yet. Let’s say we are going to try swimming in the sea and you are scared of the waves. I’ll hold your hand and walk with you down the beach till where the blue waters kiss the sand. Let’s get in a little farther till we go knee deep. Since you are scared from the start, I’m not going to force you to go any further. But if you choose to get adventurous and try a little bit more, I’m not going to leave your hand. I’ll show you what its like to be in a relationship with me. I’m going to show you what its like when the waves of my love caress your feet. I’m leaving it to you to imagine how it’s gonna be when you let yourself into this relationship. The sea holds treasures of plenty of emotions, you can find corals of my love deep down the seabed. When your love for me shines like the Sun, I’m gonna turn orange reflecting your colors. I’m not going to lie to you.. there will be some storms when the wind blows the wrong way, but I promise we’ll work out a way to get through them together. We can build our dreams together like kids build sandcastles on the beach. You can get a glimpse of me, of US when we are a couple. If you like it, let’s get into it more, swim together and explore the depths of each other’s souls. I think it would be my biggest regret if we don’t give us a chance. What do you say?”
He looked into her eyes thoughtfully, smiled and agreed. Thus, started their love story!
The four walls of her heart try to contain as much void as possible but at times, it becomes too much to deal with. It rises to her throat trying to come out as a loud scream, but she manages to choke the sound just before the escape and shoves it back into the depths of the dark corners of her heart. She wanders down the crowded lanes hoping to ignore the buzz of the unsettled thoughts running through her mind. It never helps. She talks to people around her indifferently and plasters a smile on her lips that’s more plastic than ever. After coming home from work, she sits still in her dark bedroom staring at the empty walls listening to the ticking sound of the needles of the clock. She wonders if the time is dragging those needles or the needles dragging the time. Nevertheless, the night ends and the rays of the dawn creep through the window filling the room with a mild glow. She collects herself to get up from the cold bed, with her hair disheveled and her eyes hollow. Here comes, yet another day and she has to find a way to pull through her routine. And the lone girl makes her way through the door to face the world, and to exist!